Close, but no Cigar

(via Brandon)

Where To Now?

So, yeah, I'm in a good mood. In fact, I'd say 52% of the country is in a good mood (and if you believe all of the voter suppression stories, the number's a lot higher than that.)

But having won the election, pushing the venal and corrupt out of positions of power, we have to look to the future. It's not enough to mock and ridicule the policies and tactics of the government of the past.

We have to figure out how to mock the policies and tactics of the government of the future.

I'm thinking, specifically, of The Daily Show. Yeah, it's been on the air since 1996, when Clinton was still president, but we all know it didn't really take-off until 2002-3, when, between domination of Congress, the Iraq War, and the upcoming 2004 election, the Republican's provided Jon Stewart with a steady stream of inane or hateful rhetoric, shameless pork barrelling and barely hidden corruption, desperate, insane pandering to a looney conservative base, and ass backward hunting accidents.

With a Congress that won't rush through Bush's latest crazy bill written by his corporate or evangelical masters, WILL investigate Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo (and the secret prisons. And the wire-tapping... And...), won't make a national case out of personal, family tragedy, WILL react to a national emergency BEFORE it makes landfall, and maybe, maybe, maybe, actually looks at the facts and evidence before deciding policy, rather than seeing what the policy is before deciding what the facts are...

won't Jon Stewart's job be a lot harder?

Sure, The Daily Show will still have their biggest target, W, to kick around for the next two years, and their second biggest target, the cable news networks, will still be around after that, but man, the Republicans sure did provide a lot of grist for the mill for six years there. I'm sure the Democrats will still provide some much needed crazy (and I'd rather have good government and bad comedy than vice versa), but it just won't be the same.

And as hard as it will be for Jon Stewart, how much harder will it be for (noted genre geek) Stephen Colbert? Stewart acts as himself, a topical comedian, his targets are always those in power, regardless of ideology. Colbert, however, has a more specific target in mind, the conservatives and their media machine. His character, "Stephen Colbert," is a mouthpiece for the Republican administration, a repeater and "unintentional" inverter of RNC talking points. If Hastert and Frist are not setting the agenda on the Hill, controlling both the timing of debates and the terms and conditions, where will "Colbert" get his marching orders from (and Colbert his punchlines)?

It would be funny, and actually in character for "Colbert," whose massive self-centeredness masks crushingly low-self esteem and a need to ride the coattails of those more popular, if he suddenly turned into a talking head for the left. He couldn't do it right away, with Bush still in the White House providing better crazy, he might not do it for a few years, but it'd be great if on November 5, 2008, when [insert your Democratic candidate of choice here] declares victory, "Colbert" cheers loudly that it's a victory for him personally, since he's been a long time supporter of liberal causes.

So how do you make fun of the Democrats? Wait, let me amend that. How do you intelligently make fun of the Democrats? I've heard most of the jokes, "cowards," "bumbling," "corrupt," "immoral." But lets face it, there was one party composed of draft dodgers, one who let Iraq fall into a civil war, North Korea to get a nuclear bomb, and watch an American city wash away, one party that was funded by a massive bribery campaign, one party that protected a pedophile because they were worried about losing his seat in congress,

and it wasn't the Democrats.

So what CAN we make fun of the Democrats for? Or should we let history decide?

Be a Superhero

VOTE!

Superheroes and Politics

I think superheroes should be more openly political.



Like my man GA Superman did, I want them to deal with real issues and nitty gritty problems, using fantastic powers and extra-legal means to achieve real ends.

Now, this doesn't mean I want them to have my politics. I don't need to be flattered by having Green Arrow be right all the time. I love issues where Captain Atom's conservative, pro-government stance is the correct one, or The Question's terrifying Objectivist libertarianism sounds almost convincing.

And I don't want them talking politics all the time. I came to see them hit stuff. But instead of alien slave masters, how about smacking around a sweatshop owner, or a drug dealer.

I want to see them dealing with "real world issues" is because they seem oddly detatched otherwise, particularly modern Clark Kent. The guy works for a major metropolitan newspaper and his wife is a feminist icon, in the real world and the fictional one. So the fact that he doesn't seem to have a political philosophy, let alone belong to a political party, strikes me as rather naïve.

Couldn't Batman do more to bring down the crime rate as Billionaire Bruce Wayne than a phantom of the night? And Wonder Woman's supposed to be an ambassador who seems to have no interest in international relations.

The big punch outs against mad gods and sinister secret societies are fun, and they should remain the focus of the plots. But the characters should, at least in their off time, have some interaction with the problems of the real world. Otherwise they really do look like children fighting amongst themselves while the grown-ups do all the work.

Mascot

So, it seems, I need a mascot for my blog. My hero, my sure-sell.

Dorian has Wildcat.

Scipio has Vibe.

Chris has OMAC.

I'm being a greedy bastard, and I'm taking Superman.

I guess I should be more specific. I'm taking this Superman. Golden Age Superman. Doesn't fly, doesn't have super vision, or super pets, or anything, Superman. This guy is all man.

And he wasn't afraid to get his hands dirty. I mean, just look at him! He sees evil and he goes right after it. He's so tough, he's scares the Iron Cross of Der Furhur!

Cause that was what this Superman did. This Superman fought for The People. He took on government corruption, unsafe mine conditions, war profiteers who reap a fortune off a senseless war. You know, things we couldn't possibly relate to in 2006.

And he did so as both Superman and Clark Kent. Because he knew that some jobs were jobs for the news media, and then his greatest power was the ability to write The Truth™.

And some jobs were jobs for Superman, and then it was time for the fists of steel!

What he didn't do, right away, was fight aliens and mad scientists, and he certainly did not come up with elaborate plots to protect his secret identity. Hell, he'd tell anyone who would listen that he was a reporter, if it would help his story. And he never, ever, ever, beat someone just because he represented goodness. It was either the typewriter or the fists. One or the other.

And I should also add that I do NOT mean this guy:

Earth-2 Superman is NOT the Golden Age Superman. He's an old version of the Silver Age Superman pretending to be from the Golden Age. And you know how I know?

For the past 20 years, E2 Superman has been watching Earth, pissed off that bad things happened to the superheroes.

GA Superman couldn't give two shits about what other superheroes were doing. Superheroes weren't The People. No, he'd be fine with that.

But if he had been Golden Age Superman, he would have broken out of there the moment the 2000 Election happened, and proceded to beat the shit out of the Supreme Court, the Bushes, the Republican Party, and the entire state of Florida.

Cause that's how he rolls.